A mature single Christian friend went to the ER for a persistent cough and she will be leaving the hospital a few weeks later after having an open heart surgery. Unexpected? Yes; Fair? No; God works in mysterious ways? Priceless! Life is not fair in the most ironic of ways and this is evident for the people who woke up one morning and was washed away later in the day by a Tsunami. It is a very clear reminder that shit happens whenever, wherever and we have little control over it.
My friend lamented that it was not fair that she was awaiting surgery and I understood her distressed disposition very clearly. I have used the same sentiment repeatedly throughout my life and sometimes sitting on my derriere waiting for something different to happen. This is not just about being single and wanting the spouse to make your grass greener; it is about every aspect of one’s life and making changes instead of crying foul as to “why me?”
I recognize that when we want something specific from life, we become tunnelled vision to the point of ignoring some of the good things happening. For instance, in that same week as my friend’s divine intervention, there was another young woman who was admitted willingly to the hospital after wanting to take her life and her cry was similar to ‘life is not fair.’ The reality is that not everyone gets exactly what they pray for and that does not mean the world ends and life becomes meaningless. I am slowly learning how much each day is a gift not be wasted and to be enjoyed to the best of my ability.
It’s disturbingly funny how for most people who have had a bad moment/circumstance can allow it to dominate their entire world for the rest of their days. We spend each moment digging ourselves deeper into that dark place instead of expending that energy to see life from a different view even perhaps God’s view. Being single is not life’s end all, being married is not life’s beginning either, it’s just one aspect in a complex multifaceted experience.