Obsession With The Wedding Not The Marriage

The royal wedding fever is now history and so is the frenzy surrounding the wedding day. This event is a more public example of how many women dreamed of, obsessed, excessively planned and glamorize a one day event for most of their lives-the wedding day.

There is a universal understanding that this is an extremely important day for many and most people hope to do it only once.  For a full week or more, the television had one program or another with the late Princess Diana’s wedding and every commentator had something wonderful to say about the day; however, it occurred to me that, like many women, they gave minor attention to the marriage (which we all know was a disaster).  The dismal truth is most women will put every ounce of effort into making those few hours ‘perfect’ and ‘magical’ but give the marriage an after thought.  Shouldn’t it be the other way around?

The marriage, no matter what kind of wedding a couple experiences, should have more priority. How is it possible for a wedding obsessed woman to describe every specific details she wants for that day but have difficulty describing characteristics she wants in a husband? Like the Windsor family, the US is rocked by a staggering number of divorces for one usually stupid reason or another and these numbers are not improving.  Maybe, just maybe, marriages would be happier if the couple put at least half of their energy into making a “perfect” marriage as they did with the “perfect” wedding. 

There is absolutely nothing wrong with a woman wanting a princess type wedding or planning it for most of her life. It would also be nice for most singles to be equally focused on the reality and expectations of being in a long-term committed marriage. No matter what kind of wedding a woman plans, it requires even much more harder work to keep a marriage going and it is not always a fairy tale.


2 thoughts on “Obsession With The Wedding Not The Marriage

  1. Very true. More time, thought and energy needs to go into building the relationship that leads to marriage than the very few hours of life we label a wedding. Most people don’t remember the weddings they go to. All people remember is the “what went wrong” stories from theirs and others weddings and yet we still invest a lot into them. If we did as much time preparing our inner selves as we do on our outer selves for our wedding we’d be much better brides.

    1. My mother recently said to me (when we were watching one of those obsessed about the wedding tv shows) that she does not understand why all the fuss because a marriage is only about two people. I wholeheartedly agree.

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