Foresight: Learning To Take A Different Road


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Have you ever looked at some people whose lives are in a state of emergency and wondered how did they get there? Have you ever looked at yours and think the same thing. As child, I saw homeless people and my own parents had their financial struggles and I vowed then and there that I would make something better of my life by making strategic decisions. I had a goal and a plan.

Years later, life is not exactly how I pictured it as a child; however, there is much to be thankful for and other parts to still keep prayer for earnestly. Every step of the way, it was important to me to think about how each decision will affect my future and how will it help me later? I was speaking with an older friend who has three grown (very early 20’s) children. Ever since we met to today, which is at least 5 years ago, his children’s lives have been in a state of mess. Every decision they have made including the ones in this recent week has a very disastrous ending. As he confided in me, I could not help but think that I have a very clear picture of their future if they stay on this path. I could not help but wondered (but never asked) that if he could what would he have done differently.

This is not clairvoyance or holier-than-thou judgment but the fact that I work with individuals who started out right where those young adults are and they never tried to take a different road. The end usually looks like jail, poverty, domestic violence, unruly children, lack of education, abuse and sadly no hope for the future and therefore a repeated cycle by their own children. For each of his children’s stories, I could put at least 2 names of people whose history matches theirs.

Here is my conclusion with this destructive cycle. PEOPLE ARE LAZY! We are lazy to change; we are lazy to think ahead and anticipate disaster; we are lazy to try something different from what we were indoctrinated with as kids. We can be lazy in every aspect of our lives. I can admit to being lazy and not wanting to do something different because it takes energy and courage and time and effort. The unknown can be frightening if I am not geared and ready for it.

Preachy Moment Begin: I could not help but think that as I can clearly envision those children and their children’s future and wish they could look ahead and change. How much more God sees our behaviors now, our decision to stay on the same road and the ultimate end. It is a frustrating thought for me when I think of my friend’s kids and I am sure God is even more anxious about our lives. It was a sobering thought me. Preachy Moment End.

One thing I have also learnt during my life is that something new is scary. Every time I made a decision that differed from which I was accustomed, it created such anxiety and second guessing. I was outside my comfort zone and it felt horrible. Sometimes we do need to hit rock bottom or experience something devastating before we are pushed to move; however, it does not always have to be that way.

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