Have Men Lost Their Dignity?

(A pic from the movie Mommy Dearest)

For those who watch tv, you will notice that reality tv is the go-to source of entertainment. These are not my usual choice in programming but due to some recent down time and expanded cable options, I have been able to see what the tabloids are talking about regarding these new crap of celebrities (use the word loosely). I am now aware of ‘the Situation’ and Snooki, the Kardashians, I am beginning to understand the fascination with Bridezilla and the Basketball, Baseball and any other ball wives to include the many variations of the Housewives.

It is quite unfortunate that this ridiculousness is etched into my brain. I compare these shows to a train wreck in which you just can’t look away once you have taken a glimpse (I am trying to wean myself). I have found that for majority of these shows I am not able to watch a full episode because it seems so painful and ridiculous versus entertaining.  The breakdown is this, for the most part, all of the shows with a majority female cast usually entail backstabbing, and a constant barrage of bickering and gossiping in epic proportion. The things that these women bicker about which inevitably results in fake friendships which turns to hate is something I can remember happening in high school or grade school. The shows with the mixed cast usually focuses on everyone sleeping with everyone. The male focused reality tv is usually in two category: the unnatural overly feminized gay centered or macho man centered.

Reality tv women have already loss their dignity since the inception of these shows. Anyone remembers Who wants to marry a millionaire, Joe millionaire (who turned out to be poor), girls gone wild (which I have only seen the commercials on tv), all the bachelors cattle call series etc. Most people find these shows entertaining because there are women who are always willing to do something sexual to get ahead. Women have done that since the dawn of time (our sexuality is very powerful) so there is not much surprise anymore.  

However, the disturbing trend for men comes with these bridal shows. Bridezilla to be exact. This is truly one show that I have not watched a full episode except for the Where are they now? updates (I can only stomach this in very small doses). My curiosity is to see how many of the couples are still married. This reality series makes me cringe for a number of reasons:

-The women are so obnoxious that you truly believe that someone needs to slap them senseless

-The men are complete and utter wusses who have lost the rights to their testicles and manhood

-This is a prime reason why many people should not be married. God help the children

-It is ridiculous how others around the bride put up with her bullsh*t just because of a wedding

-The men allow these women to manipulate them and wonder why they do not get any respect

It makes me wonder if MOST men have lost their dignity and the right to claim any kind of manhood? People might blame the weakening of men’s character on the liberation of women; however, I fail to see the direct correlation. An alternate thought is did the women’s liberation highlighted certain men’s less than manly traits? Back in the day, a man was forced to be the provider, head of household etc but since the pressure is off, they are free to be less than a leader. Another thought is could it be that these shows highlight something most women never think about which is men’s desperation for companionship shows up as a weaker, I-will-take-anything to not be lonely behavior? One of the men who chose to remarry his ex-wife despite everyone’s bewilderment (they divorced less than one year later) said that remarrying her was better than being alone. Ummmm… do I smell a severe case of desperation? Is it a fair trade to lose your manhood in order to gain companionship?

Most women who were raised in a traditional enough home, have images of a strong man for their husbands. Note that I am not referring to an abusive man, neglectful man etc. I am referring to a man who commands respect as much as he gives it; he has a voice and is confident with the women in his life. Most men I know are not bullied by the women in their lives. I can guarantee that if the show was Groomzillas and the men behaved in the same manner, then everyone would be crying domestic violence or fear for the woman’s happiness. However, since it’s the man that’s being humiliated, then we shake our heads, belittle him, and change the channel. This is no different from that reality tv show teen mom in which one of the young women consistently verbally berate and physically accosted her boyfriend on tv; however, the biggest concern from the public was the fact that in one episode she assaulted him in front of their child. He actually fits the description of an abused man (this is not as rare as you might think).

Another plausible explanation why these shows are filled with spineless men could be more behavioral. Reality tv is all about drama; therefore, the producers seek out couples who are already a dysfunctional match for each other. There is the phrase that ‘there is someone for everyone’ and this is true of these shows. Follow me for a second: These men’s personalities are naturally submissive and they usually prefer someone else to take charge. These men will seek out (and probably have for most of their lives) women with dominant to controlling personalities. So, what we see on tv is only a concentrated set of personality types that make for great television but not indicative of the average male (I hope). The other thing that I noticed (amid the protests of the wives that they were unfairly portrayed) is that the people who are closest in their lives, to include parents, are willing enablers of their verbally demanding and sometimes abusive behaviors and that is something you cannot fake for a few weeks of taping. Breeding does start at home!

So the hope for many single women getting their entertainment from these highly dysfunctional people’s lives is that there are men who still have their dignity, their testicles in tact and is able to announce their manhood. Single men, if you should glimpse any of these vile female behaviors while flipping the channel to football, be aware that not all women are that way and YOU choose what kind of woman you want to be hitched to for the rest of your lives.



8 thoughts on “Have Men Lost Their Dignity?

  1. I absolutely loved this. I have many male friends who go after taken/single women because “she looks rlly hot / shes acts nice / I like going after the chase.” And then once the women break up with their bf’s for them, about a month later, those women break up with them. they ask me if every girl they meet is like that and only uses them for their money. It’s honestly a no-brainer. “not all women are that way and YOU choose what kind of woman you want to be hitched to for the rest of your lives.” is definitely right on. I have yet to meet a man who still has some sort of dignity and can reach manhood, but i guess that’s my life-long goal even as a friend.
    But I do agree that the television affects us (and also songs very highly). It makes me miss the years of black-and-white when shows and songs were about sweet love, romance, respect, and had a sense of dignity to them (not to say there wasn’t any drama and stuff).
    There was this 1 time I watched a show (don’t recall the name now) where the man was in the army and by the end of the show he pushed his pride to the side, got on his knees, and asked his girlfriend’s parents for her hand in marriage and at the exact same time, the woman did the same to his parents (although doing that was unheard of at the time). They progressed slowly but it was extremely sweet. 🙂
    I grew up mostly with these romantic kind of shows (color 1s of course too) even though the modern channels were/still are Nickelodeon and Disney channel and whatnot. Which i must admit, i got into a phase of watching that stuff, and it was really setting me on the wrong path for a while >_<. But it's thanks to the teachings of my childhood shows that I am who I am today, I haven't fallen for peer pressure and I do my best to be a good friend, and in turn my friends are able to call me a 1-of-a-kind-unique-person (they made it up xD). It's definitely put me in a happy place. 🙂

    1. I think people are starting to believe that they have ‘no choice’ in their partners and then complain when things go awry. However, if we take the time to examine ourselves and the people we are attracted to, we would learn so much and choose wisely.

  2. The more immorality that is allowed in, the more immorality comes out.

    Too much of what is on tv and radio, not to mention the internet is driven towards things like lust, greed, compulsion and lack of self control. We are seeing the fruits of the filth we have consumed the last 20 years.

    It is only gonna get worse. Parents need to be much more aware of what their kids are watching. People now are a product of a Godless school system.

    1. Unfortunately, parents do not have the power anymore to monitor what their children sees because the advancement in technology has provided us with media access everywhere.

  3. The vast majority of TV for at least the last two to three decades is, IMHO “shovelware.” I find myself watching old TV shows and movies from the 40s and 50s with quality writing, plots, and character development. I quickly grew weary of TV and movies that insult my intelligence, attack my faith (and even common sense), and promote Hollywood’s social and political agendas.

    I don’t doubt there are men and women who are really like this, but they are not you and me. I know there are respectable men and women out there, and I want to spend my time getting to know them, and encourage them. I am waiting and praying that I will someday meet a lady that loves God first and foremost, but who also has the patience to love me for who I am, even with all my faults and failings. I will love and cherish her in the same way. I appreciate shows and movies that exemplify this kind of respect, logic, and reverence for God and faith.

    1. I like that term shovelware 🙂 and I do agree with you regarding the quality of entertainment or what passes for entertainment. Unfortunately, the power of tv is so strong that this and future generations are blindly being brainwashed to believe that these behaviors are “normal.” While the normal people are starting to be viewed as a novelty or archaic.

    2. Right on. Same goes for me just vice-versa with gender. I want to be a good role model and a good mother one day just as my mother was for me, so I hope to find a man who still has his dignity and can walk beside me as my equal. 🙂

      It’s really sad growing older and seeing so many people take the same path and copying the examples on tv and in music. Sometimes I look back and wonder when I was separated from the rest. Not that I’m unhappy I was, I think I’d be more miserable knowing that I was like many other kids (8-15) who had a tough time with parents and watched R-18 shows for 6-10 hours a day.

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