Riding the Edge


I’m on the edge’ that nebulous edge that is unique for different people. It can be scary, exhilarating, experimental, depressing,  or even dark. It is that edge most people tell themselves they will never cross. It is the ‘it will never happen to me’ place. Well, that is until you find yourself in a state of mind in which you have not only crossed the line but have gone deep beyond it and is at risk of losing one’s self.

It is the edge in which life is out of control and suicide seems like a good option. It is the edge when a good girl from a good upbringing stays with an abusive husband. It is when a faithful church-going Christian loses his strong faith. It is when a marriage is shaky and the grass looks greener some place else. It is when a smart man makes bad decisions and compromises his integrity. It is when someone has loss his/her perspective; loss his/her way.

People cross that edge when they have loss sight of or is missing something important in their lives.  A man who is desperate for love, a family in financial difficulties, or a Christian whose desperate  prayers are not answered.  You have created dreams and expectations for your lives, you have an image as to what you need and what will make you happy. However, for many people, their dreams and their reality are never the same. The stark truth can be overwhelming which pushes them into an unfamiliar place that was never imagined or intended. The place of bad compromise, lying, cheating, stealing, deception, anger and disappointed with God, the place of rebellion, defiance, doubt, shame and a slow erosion of one’s identity, self-esteem, strength, values, confidence, integrity and one’s self.

A desperate man will grasp at anything. So, the problem with riding and crossing the edge is that people are frantically searching for anything to put that dream back together, to find meaning and purpose in their lives. They are desperate for that happy ending and the ideal life that was never promised.

How do you move back from the edge? Slowly, prayerfully and carefully. People’s lives and dreams did not just fall apart in a day. It took time and accumulation of little things to get you to that edge so, it will take time, STRENGTH, dedication, and small steps to get you back on track. It is easier to fall into a hole than to climb out of it so expect moments of fear, weakness, setbacks, and self-doubt. It is all a part of the learning process.

Join me on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/singlechristianwomen/

 

Is It Time To Move?


 

We sit and wait then sit and wait some more because we are waiting for a ‘sign’ or the right time. The problem that comes with always sitting and waiting is that we miss many opportunities to start goals, pursue a dream, follow God’s plan, get ourselves together and live life. While there is a time and place for everything, most people become complacent in wanting things to be handed to them in order to make a move.

Failure does not only come from trying but it also comes from sitting still. It comes from being quiet when watching a spouse self-destruct, it comes from being afraid, it comes from being set in our comfort zone, it comes from allowing others to hold us back. We fail to grow.

Just as a church body can become stagnant  and ineffective from closing themselves off and keeping the status quo, so can the Christian or any one become dead to self. Jesus was never in one place. He moved about doing his thing. What he had was his beliefs and determination of self. He also took the time to sit quietly for reflection and understanding.

Christian singles are told to wait on the Lord. Well, waiting on the lord does not mean locked in the house praying. A mother who needs a break does not get it by keeping the regular schedule day plan. The person who wants to finally go after his/her dreams does not do so by still dreaming and talking about it. I am guilty of delaying a childhood dream.

A good friend of mine is in a different place in her life than she was one year ago. She took a detour from a lucrative career to help her new husband start his business. I am sure the picture of her life a year ago has no resemblance to what it is now which is putting her on a different path. The point is moving is not all bad and while there will be some hurdles and scary stuff to face, it is definitely a step worth taking.

Get off your butt and take the first step to move. https://www.facebook.com/singlechristianwomen/